I’ve got a secret.

but then this past weekend she made me the best cookies ever you guys and you just don’t do that for dumb hos you don’t want dating your son okay you just don’t.

This is literally the cutest puppy I have ever seen. A blonde cocker spaniel. WOOK AT HIMS WITTLE FEETS.

Yes hello this is dog

I just ate this all so hard. Jim N Nick’s, yall. No joke.

WHERE ARE YOU ALL HIDING.

I would really love to sit down and hold one of your hands and figure out things about myself because I am so confused and upset and I feel like my heart is about to burst into tears.

I don’t like the word lesbian. For some reason it sounds like an ugly word with blunt teeth that bruise.

But I don’t like how I’m feeling right now, either.

I think all of you girls who like girls are congregating in a secret place far away from the South, maybe somewhere in Connecticut or Oregon, and if so can I please have an honorary invite, I know I have a boyfriend and I don’t really count but I’d really like for you to clear my head.

Or at least sit next to me so we can rest our heads together, temple to temple, and maybe you can calm me just by understanding.

I find fun things when I get super drunk on campus.

BEST FRIENDS FOREVER, BEST FRIENDS FOREVER, RING!

What is your favorite song at the moment? Cold December by Matt Costa. Right now. Just right now though.

What is your dream vacation? … A free one. Where everything is free. And I can do whatever I want. For free.

Who is your favorite actress? Anne Hathaway, Natalie Portman, Scarlett Johannsen, Emma Watson, your mom, Zach Braff.

What is your favorite movie? Life is Beautiful.

If you could bring any fictional character to life, who would you? HARRY FUCKING POTTER CUZ THEN MAGIC WOULD BE REAL.

What do you want to be when you grow up? Awesome.

If you could change your name, what would you change it to? I wouldn’t, I love my first name. My middles names and last name… I’d be Grace Thunderpants McBonerqueen.

Do you play any instruments? If not, what would you want to learn? Flute in marching band, but I’d love to learn drums.

What’s your favorite time of year? CHRISTMAS! And summer. … If Christmas was in summer I’d explode. No I wouldn’t, cuz then I’d be in Australia, and there would be giant spiders.

Would you rather drink only chocolate milk or eat only chocolate candy? … What world is this what wat is this no I want both.

What is your favorite pasttime/hobby? Writing. Sex. Writing about sex. Playing on the internet. Like a douchebag.

Look at these faggots.